|
Ugh.
Friday, July 28, 2006 7:53 PM As much as I thought being an actress would be the best job I could ever wished for, I realise I can NEVER be one. Period. Few days back, I was supposed to record a 1 min "thank-you" VCR speech for the Best Song Writer Competition award giving ceremony. I was unable to attend it with Kewei so we have to record a short clip so they can air it during the actual event. I got my Sister to be the camera-man while I "recite" my speech infront of the camera. SHEESED. It's really making me frustrated and stuff. I can never get my lines correct and my poor Sister has to NG over and over again. I think it's only like after 20+ takes before we got an ok-ay one. Sigh. The more I am being restricted, the more I can't be myself infront of the camera. It's really a pity not able to be there because F.I.R is gonna be the guest of honour giving out the prize. And of course, I can't wait for the $$ to fly into my bank account because there are so many things in mind that I wanna buy! And so, my Grandma got discharged from the hospital. She is trying to cope with her aching legs and hands while we tried to revamp her room abit so that it would be convenient for her to move around. She has to attend physiotherapy every Thursday till she fully recovers. Yesterday I stayed back at her place to keep her company till my Uncle returns home from work. I was chatting with Grandma but things got a little out of hand and I sort of "scolded" her. I am not trying to be strike by lighting for doing that but there are so much negative thoughts in her. She thinks that hiring a domestic helper for her is not a good idea because there are so many maids breaking the law these days. Murder, seduction, stealing and more. I couldn't let her continue having these thoughts so I raised my voice alittle to make sure she understand what I am trying to get into her. This is a very stereotype society. Rather weird too. Most humans prefer to listen to negative stuffs than positive stuff. These cases are more to gossiping. Look at all the papers these days. Whatever is splashing across the cover page has got to do with crimes like murder, fraud, stealing, raping and more. There are only a handful of news about charity, good deeds and whatsoever happy stuff. It's like only negative news interest our mind. It's weird, really. I really hate it when 三姑六婆 starts to influence her mind in a bad way. She will imagine things and turn herself into a paranoia. She likes to say things like suicide, death and old folk home. So I told her, she wasn't even suffering from any serious illness. People who are suffering from cancer or even losing their limps, are fighting to live on and get cured, why are you giving up hopes when your children are showing you with so much care, concern and attention? And because of her, I felt so bad for neglecting my other 2 grandma who stays far away from me (while she stays just opposite my block so the many of times visiting her is naturally more). I felt ashamed of myself for not planning my time well enough to share my concern to the rest of my 2 Grandma. So little time but so many things in life to deal with. You know, you have to cherish life. They are really really fragile. Shame on you, if you thought of ending your life to solve problems. It should be the last thing on your mind. Unless you're a selfish poop.
|
visitors since 2007
